March 20th, 2020 at 9:49 AM
Redding Township, Illinois
Every day contains an adventure. I walked north
to the McDonalds, jonesing for wifi. I was greeted by the door by a woman in
the blue shirt of team leader. I asked her, "I need to use the wireless.
Could I set one of your chairs outside the dining room window?"
"I don't care". And she brought out a
blue chair.
I sat down on the blue chair, made a connection
to the wifi and uploaded three days of writing to Google Documents.
I edited two stories and posted the stories with
illustrations to Blogger and shared the link to where my readers would find
them.
I was working on story three when I heard in my
ear, "Sir, I need to take your chair. I'm sorry."
Deeply at work, the approach of a woman wearing
the black shirt of top store management had escaped my notice. I found myself
listening to a voice out of the blue. It's always easier to be polite when one
has a moment to turn, look at a person, adjust, before hearing the voice of
authority.
"But I'm almost done. Could I have a few
more minutes. And then I'll shove off."
"I'm sorry, but I need your chair
now."
"Look, I'm not doing any harm. I'm socially
distant from everyone, although we are standing too close. If I were sitting in
a car, using the Wi-Fi, it wouldn't come to notice at all. Plus, I'm visually
interesting. I'm sure a news photographer is going to take my picture for the
Streator Times".
I tried to reason with her. I had gotten so much
done connected to the great server in the sky for ten minutes. I had spent most
of my life since 1991 connected to the internet to get work done.
"Yes, but we're not to allow people on the
premises. The district manager told us".
I stood up. "Go ahead and take the
chair". I stepped away four feet for social distance.
She took my chair.
I stood up and held up my laptop with my left
hand and typed with my right hand. I posted the third article. It took about
five minutes.
I pulled out the McDonald's App. I found a deal
on hot apple pies, two for a buck fifty. I ordered the pair from the store where
the app knew I was standing outside. I punched in curbside pick up, sign three.
I waited.
An employee was allowed to enter the store,
arriving for his shift. The employee who let him enter called to me, "Sir, we
will bring out your apple pies".
I cooled my heels. It was taking a long time but
the store was popular. It would have been easier to sit in a car but I had
walked up. At least I could get service. Before curb side pickup, you had to
arrive to the drive through window in a car. No car. No lobby hours. No
service.
An employee stepped out to deliver curbside in a
blue crewmember uniform. A white sedan drove up and stopped at my feet. An
armed officer stepped out. "Sir, were you asked to leave the premises of
the McDonald's?"
The crew member called to the officer,
"It's okay, officer. He's waiting for his hot apple pies".
I thought to myself. "I wasn't asked to
leave the premises. I was asked to give up my chair. I complied. McDonald's
called the police on me"?
"I'm just waiting for my food,
officer".
"Okay, then. Looks like we have a case of
miscommunication". He got into his white, unmarked police car and went to
the drive through to order.
I thought to myself. "A case of
miscommunication? I almost wore handcuffs? I better recalibrate because the virus
is making us all cuckoo".
The woman who had brought out the chair in the
first place brought out the hot apple pies in a lunch sack.
"You called the police on me? I wasn't
asked to leave".
"The manager thought you were rude".
The police can be called upon a party for rudeness?
"I was assertive. There's a difference. I'm sorry if I got you in trouble
by asking for the chair in the first place".
"That's no big deal. I hope you like the
pies".
I did like the hot apple pies, hot enough to
burn my tongue. A good reminder to hold my tongue for the duration. I walked
away and munched on pie on the march. I was glad I hadn't sent them back in
protest.
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